guard duty again.allison was sick and tired of being put on guard duty. sure, she was a guard, but they could have assigned her patrol – even for one day. all she wanted was a break from the stress it brought her. the job itself was not stressful; there was not much to actually GUARD in a crashed spaceship, aside from the few prisoners that were brought in and released on a daily basis.
they were all minor crimes, anyways. they were all minor crimes that would have gotten people EXECUTED on the ark.
“we do what needs to be done.”
ice shot through allison’s veins at the familiar voice. was she dreaming? was she on drugs? she knew that her grandfather had died – hell, she had seen his corpse with her own eyes, watched him get a spear shoved through his chest, so there was no way he was there.
“gerard?”
her throat tightened. as she lowered her gun to her side, eventually allowing it to drop onto the ground, it became harder to breathe. flashes of his face, of the brutal training through which he had put her to morph her into the perfect WEAPON, raced through her mind.
“you’re not strong enough.”
she could feel his cool hand on her throat, crushing her airway to teach her a lesson: she needed to become s t r o n g e r. no, not just stronger – allison had to become the STRONGEST. she had to train so much, gain so much power that nobody was above her, so that she was the one on top. no weakness. no mercy. no humanity.
“you’re weak. pathetic. you need to be stronger.”
allison lost her footing, stumbling and crashing into the wall – at least that way she had something to support her. she gasped for breath, but it would not enter her lungs fast enough. there was not enough air. she was suffocating. tears blotted her vision and made it difficult to see, augmenting her panic and delirium, but her fingers dragged against the metal of the wall, trying to distinguish between reality and the illusions – but it was so vivid.
“you’re a weak little girl.”
“no,” she huffed, her single spoken word causing a tremor in her voice. “i’m not. i’m not weak. i’m… i…”
I CAN’T B R E A T H E.
while being arkadia’s go to mechanic had it’s perks, it
also left her with an overflow of work. honestly, it seemed like every
day more and more assignments piled up on her list of things to do. not
that she was going to complain. having work kept her busy. having work
made her feel useful. feeling useful allowed her to think of herself as
anything but broken. she needed the projects because in a way, they were
therapeutic. better than feeling useless. feelings like those usually
only lead to panic attacks, and that was the last thing she needed. to
shut down. people needed her.
that being said,
even she needed a break sometimes. that’s what clarke & abby always
said. working herself to exhaustion was no better. that’s why she was
making her way to the mess hall; or had at least started on her way
there.
( no… i’m not.)
panicked words from a voice so familiar, caught her attention. for a
second she debates just leaving it be, but there’s just something in the
way the words sits with her that finds her feet carrying her towards
the voice. towards Allison. honestly, she had no idea what she was
expecting to walk up on, but she surely hadn’t been expecting to find
the brunette ALONE, face paled and sweating, as though she was facing a ghost.
❝ allison
———
❞ a gentle but firm hand reaches out for her shoulder, holding her
steady in hopes of keeping her from falling and hurting herself. ❝ allison.
❞ there’s a firmness to her words this time. an attempt to GROUND her. to shake her free of whatever state she was in. ❝alli… listen to me. you’re okay. you’re okay… breathe.
❞
familiar words. ( BREATHE, YOU AREN’T DYING. JUST BREATHE! )
i am in NO way affiliated with Lindsey Morgan, the CW network,nor the rest of the cast & crew of ‘the 100.’ this blog’s purpose is solely for my own enjoyment & no copyright infringement is ever intended. all icons seen on this blog were created by me & are NOT for anyone’s use other than my own, without permission. that being said, i am not against making icons for others & would actually be more than happy to make them for you, & if you message me with icon requests, i will make them & customize them for you.
independent. semi-selective.
this is a & semi-selective independent roleplay blog, which means that most of my interactions will take place with those that i am in a mutual follow with — meaning that i am following you & you are following me.. i am always open to new people to write with though, so if you're interested in writing or plotting with me, just throw me a message and we can certainly discuss doing something. that being said, sometimes i will come across characters i may not know and thus might not be interested in writing with. please don’t take this personally — it is never a reflection of you or your blog, but rather what i’m comfortable with at any given moment.
following.
i’m a fairly selective follower — i won’t always follow everyone back. i prefer a clean & organized dash, & i prefer to follow those that i believe could help me grow as a writer & encourage growth of my character, as well as those that i enjoy seeing on my dashboard. once again, this isn’t meant as anything personal. it doesn’t mean that i don’t like you or your muse. it’s just a way of keeping things tidy. (& please give me some time to follow you back. it sometimes take me a few days to see that i’ve gotten any new followers! if you want me to follow you, you can always throw a message my way and i'll totally check out your page)
triggers & nsfw.
due to the nature of the show, there will be some triggering content featured on this blog in written and/or visual form. i will do my very best to tag everything appropriately. (though i will most likely not be tagging blood except for pictures that i see fit, as a large portion of my icons do contain blood, dirt, & grime given the scenes on the show.) if i’ve missed anything or i’m not tagging something that you’d like me to, please let me know! as for nsfw content, i will be tagging both written & visual forms. i’m over the age of 18 so smut will likely occur, though it’s may not occur with any consistent frequency. i will NOT write smut with anyone below the age of 18 under any circumstances, so don't ask.
canons & au's.
the main verse of this blog will follow the canon storyline at all points, as i am currently up to date with the show & plan to continue to watch it. i am always open to AUs & crossovers, as well as threads pre-the 100 storyline, which will be expanded upon on my verses page. (i'm familiar with many fandoms & if there's something on the internet for me to read about your fandom, i'm usually more than willing to do so.) i also tend to go by this rule: if i am starting the interaction without previous plotting, the interaction will be in my character's universe. if you are starting the interaction, the interaction will be in your character's universe. of course, there are exceptions to every rule but this is one that i prefer to stick by, as it reduces the confusion. but my ask is always open if you're interested in plotting a new verse!!!
replies & formatting.
i'm an admittedly slow replier (like… super slow at times), & my muse occasionaly doesn’t want to cooperate with me. there are some days where i can reply immediately, & others were it could take me hours to write a single sentence. if you're looking for someone who can consistently turn out fast replies, i'm not your girl. sorry. & please do not rush me for replies. a gentle reminder once or twice is okay & often encouraged, but pestering me is a sure way to kill my muse -- &, to be honest, i'll probably make you wait longer out of spite. (◕‿◕✿)
as far as formatting goes, it varies depending on my mood. sometimes i'll go out of my way to format things elaborately, & other times i simply can't be bothered. i do, however, prefer to use icons over gifs. but when roleplaying with me, use whatever you're comfortable with, so never worry about your formatting or gif/icon use, I will love you all the same! the quality is what's important.
shipping.
this blog will NOT just revolve around romantic relationships. while i'm sure they will occur a lot over the course of this blog, i'm not here for the sole purpose of shipping. i'd like to develop Raven and her other relationships -- familial, platonic, & otherwise. & while i do have my preferred pairings, that does NOT mean that i will ship Raven with the first of that muse to come around, nor will I only exlusively ship with those characters. in the end, chemistry is key in all ships -- if it's not there, i won't ship it & if it is, i will.
i will be playing Raven’s sexuality as bisexual (with a preference towards women). if you have any issues with that, feel free to ask me about it, or even unfollow if you feel the need.
the mun.
i’m not mean or anything, i promise. one of my favorite parts of roleplaying, is the opportunity it gives me to expand my horizons, and meet new people & when it comes down to it, it’s the most important part of this for me. so never be afraid to throw me a message out of character or to ask for my kik or skype!! thank you for reading the guidelines, and i look forward to roleplaying with you all!!!
